You might say there’s a certain etiquette applied to the holidays. A manner of speaking and doing, if you will. It’s sugar plums, rainbows, little lads who love berries and cream, and of course, a jolly old fat man who’s watching you like a CIA spook on Escobar family member. Technically, it’s a time to be on your best behavior. It’s not a time to leave your second youngest alone to secure the house from porch pirates and Christmas kleptos with an elaborate series of booby traps and a beebee gun. We all know what happens to misbehaving grown ups during the holiday season anyways. It’s this…
I’ll never get tired of watching people fail at nunchucks. Nothing brings me sweet peace more than that. It’s like the greatest self esteem boost ever.
So when you’re thinking about grinching the heck out of some unsuspecting family members with some coal and a Tom Cruise Scientology recruiting pamphlet, consider this first…
Jazz Bear just ruined these kids during a game of musical chairs pic.twitter.com/vXtKo83e2z
— Rob Perez (@WorldWideWob) December 19, 2021
Sure…it seems fun at first, but have you the considered the lawsuit? That’s why I leave my Christmas trash goblin feelings to the professionals. That’s right. Sports mascots. Further proof here…
The @Timberwolves really had an eggnog chugging contest
Wait 'til the Lakers fan's reaction
pic.twitter.com/3IrXmHDh8a
— NBA on ESPN (@ESPNNBA) December 18, 2021
Not only is this mascot obviously cheating, they’re making people chug eggnog, which seems similar to being entered into a state fair eating contest that features uncooked tripe. Plenty of examples here to further demonstrate that being mean during the holidays are best left to people who are paid to. Sports mascots. Shenanigans.
